A Girl!

After lots of prodding from the technician today we found out that we're having a healthy girl. Everything looks great, I'm gaining weight, and my blood pressure looks good. She wasn't moving around too much so the tech was having a hard time getting good pictures. She was breach, so she was sitting with her head by my stomach and her legs were crossed, which made it hard to tell the gender at first. Finally the tech pressed up against her little bum and she could see that it was a girl. We could even see her little face, but her arms were covering part of it. It was really exciting to see and we're so happy that everything is good.

Movement!

Yesterday at church I felt the baby moving for the first time and I didn't wonder if it was just digestion stuff. It was really obvious to me and I was really excited. For a special treat they had a full orchestra to play Christmas songs for about 20 minutes before the sermon and maybe the baby could hear it because he/she was moving a lot. I was so excited that I had a lump in my throat and I'm sure I was just beaming. Luckily, they had dimmed the lights so I didn't look like a dork. The message was on joy and as soon as the pastor got up to speak she asked, "When was the last time you felt true joy?" I wanted to stand up yell, "Right now! My baby's kicking me!" I can't remember feeling that happy in a really long time. After wanting to be a mom for so long it just felt so deep and satisfying. I can't wait to feel more and to later meet the baby. Tomorrow is our big ultrasound so I'll post after that.

18 weeks and 6 days

Today I went to the doctor because I've had a stomach virus since Saturday and I was beginning to worry it would be affecting the baby. The doctor assured me that everything was fine, though, so that's good.

I recently had someone tell me that she couldn't even tell I was pregnant. I wasn't impressed by that comment at all. She's someone that unfortunately says a lot of things without thinking and I frequently get annoyed with her. I'm not that big, but I also would like to think that people aren't just thinking I have a beer gut. I did have a flat stomach before. My next ob/gyn appointment is next Tuesday and we're really excited to see how things are progressing in there and if the baby co-operates we'll find out if it's a boy or a girl. I used to think I'd just want to wait until the birth to find out, but it turns out I'm way too impatient for that.

Funny Christmas

This is my favourite SNL Christmas sketch.

Deep Freeze

I survived my first day of -40 weather here in Edmonton and I have to say it's not so bad when you're dressed properly. I would have liked to have had some snowpants, though, as the long johns I was sporting didn't quite do the trick.

I'm home with an upset stomach today. It seems to be getting better, but at least I'm not infecting any kiddies. I had a terrible headache last night and it was lingering this morning when I woke up, but of course I can't take anything (not entirely true; I could take Tylenol, but I'd rather not).

My cousin Christphor has arrived in town to do construction work. I plan to invite him over for supper and make sure he has a home-cooked meal. He's younger than me by a few years and we we've never been close, but my maternal instincts are kicking in and I'd like to make sure he's doing ok.

I don't plan to do much today, but the dishwasher needs some loading and unloading and I need to get started on the scarf for the girl at work to whom I am a "Secret Santa".

Jasper

I've been wanting to write about our weekend in Jasper for a while now, but I've been pretty busy. Jasper is my favourite place in Canada and it was so nice to go back for Scott's birthday. It was relatively quiet in the park since it's the off-season, but there were a lot of skiers at our hotel. This picture is from a little lake we hiked to. It was so peaceful and serene.

My weekend starts to get busy tomorrow. We meet with our doula tomorrow night for the first time and I'm really excited about it. On Friday night we're going to the hockey game, Saturday morning I have a meeting at church and I promised to make a quiche (which I'm totally regretting now), and then that afternnon I have a bunch of shopping to do. Then on Sunday we're going to the Oilers super skills competition. It should be a good weekend, but I wish I could skip the meeting at church. I took off next Friday at work so that I can get some stuff done here because I'm feeling quite over-whelmed. I don't like working full time very much.

My baby at 15 weeks

I don't have any new belly pics to post here because I'm really not showing much yet. I just had my second doctor's appointment today and it was really exciting because we heard the heartbeat. It's beating at around 150 beats per minute which is apparently in the normal range. It was so comforting and exciting to hear it since I haven't been growing very fast. I've only gained half a pound since my last appointment 4 weeks ago. But there really is a baby in there! He told me that since I'm tall I won't show as quickly as some other women and I'll always measure smaller.

I thought it was cute that the doctor found the heartbeat and then lost it because the baby moved away really fast.

Out of the Mouths of Babes

These are some of the cute things the parents have heard their kids say about me:

One mom told me her daughter will be upset when I go on mat. leave because I'm "so nice" and when they play "daycare" she always has to be "Marlene".

One of the boys told his mom that daddy loves Marlene.

A dad told me that his daughters named their pumpkin after me. That's my favourite.

Kids are so good for the ego.

Snow

I woke up to snow and I loved it. I really missed snow when I was in Vancouver - real snow. I cleaned off my car and ventured out on the snowy roads for the first time in about 3 years. It wasn't so bad, though. After making it through a traffic cirle I was going somewhat slow around the turn because of all the snow on the road. A guys behind me decided to pass me on the right going a little too fast. Once he got in front of me he started fish-tailing and I was really glad he didn't do that when he was beside me.

I made it to the church in Sherwood Park for my women's breakfast club and I was really glad I did. It was a really small group of women, but they were really sweet and they made me feel welcome. It's really nice to find a place that I feel a connection with and I can make a home base at. Now we just have to move to Sherwood park so i don't have to drive as far. Scott already works there so it just makes sense. It's about 20 minutes south of Edmonton.

Well, I'm at home with a stuffed up head and a sore throat, but I have to say that I'm in a pretty good mood. Yesterday I was feeling a little nervous about what my birth experience was going to be like based on the fact that I'm going with an OB/GYN instead of a midwife. For some reason I have the idea in my head that doctor's will laugh at me when I say that I want a natural birth. I know women all over the place deliver naturally with a doctor so I don't know where this came from. So yesterday I did some research on doulas and natural childbirth classes here in town and I started to feel better. I've spoken with my potential doula on the phone and I felt instant chemistry with her. We set up a consultation for the end of November. She also told me wonderful things about the doctor who'll be doing the birth so that made me really excited.

When I was looking at the website I was also excited to find a company here who brings parents cloth diapers every week and picks them up for washing for what I think is an incredible price. I've always wanted to use cloth diapers because of environmental reasons, but I also think they are better for the babies and they encourage toilet training sooner. I'm suddenly feeling so much better knowing that it is still possible to have the birth experience that I've always wanted!

Doctor's Appointment

I had my first doctor's appointment this morning and it took forever. Scott picked me up at the daycare at 11am and we arrived 15 minutes before the scheduled time of 11:30 in case there was any paper work to do. I only had to fill out my contact info and medical card number. At around noon they finally admitted us and we went to a little room where a nurse asked me a billion questions about my general health and took my blood pressure. All of that was fine. She took us to a small examination room and I slipped off to go the bathroom (the second time since I had arrived, of course) and when I came back Scott relayed the message to me that the doctor would be there any minutes and I was supposed to remove my nice warm clothing and put on some paper. I did this and sat on the paper-wrapped table and waited - and shivered. Scott and I sat and chatted for a while, but time kept going by. After about 25 minutes we started to get concerned that they had forgotten about us, but decided to give it some more time. Finally, after almost an hour, the doctor came in. It turned out he had to do a c-section at the hospital next door. We decided we'd forgive him for it. He did all the necessary things and listened for the heartbeat, which was the sole purpose that Scott had come along, but we couldn't hear it yet. He said that we'll be able to hear it at the next appointment in 4 weeks, though, so Scott will go to that one with me too. Another four weeks after that one we'll do the ultrasound and we'll find out if we're having a boy or a girl. I'm excited about that. I'm too excited to wait the whole pregnancy. We don't really care what it is, but it's fun to know.

I'm dissapointed that I can't have a midwife, but it's not covered in Alberta's healthcare. I've always said that I'd have the baby in the hospital with a midwife, but we can't really afford to pay for it, so I'll have to make do with a doctor. He seems like a nice man and apparently it's the nurses who care for you most of the time.

Scott and I went to church this morning at the Sherwood Park Alliance Church. It's the church he and his parents went to when they lived here before. I am happy to say that I really liked it. We went to the early, more traditional service, but I think next week I'll give the later contemporary one a try to see how I like it. I'm really excited about the opportunity to meet people and finally have some friends of my own. They have a whole bunch of women's groups and get-togethers that I'm looking forward to attending, like the monthly breakfast and the annual Christmas dinner.

Scott's out golfing (in the rain) with his friend and I just got my beef-vegetable soup in the slow cooker. It'll be done a little later than I'd like, but I haven't made it in a while so I'm looking forward to it. I haven't had a hard time cooking like some pregnant women do, but the smells coming through from other people's apartments is hard for me to deal with. I haven't been feeling nauseated like before, but I still can't stand smells. I was trying to describe it to Scott today because I think he's pretty sick of hearing me complain about it. My sense of smell is so strong sometimes that I can taste whatever is I'm smelling. So when I'm getting a bunch of things coming through the vents and windows like cigarettes, pot, laundry detergent and bad cooking, I feel pretty terrible. At the grocery store today I was trying to find some hand soap that was unscented, but I didn't have any luck. That's another thing I don't like.

Eleven Weeks

So here's my first belly shot. Ignore the mess behind me and the fact that I look terrible after a long day at work. At this point I feel like I'm having a girl even though Scott tells me it's silly to have a "feeling". He doesn't get women's intuition. Of course, I could be wrong. We don't care, though, as long it's healthy.

I've been feeling good for the past two days so I'm hoping that the morning sickness is going to be finished for good. It makes work a lot nicer when I'm not feeling sick all the time. Work's been fun actually, since I told them because another girl I work with is also pregnant and she's due a week before me. We get to bond over our bellies.

Spilling My Secret

It's time for me to spill my secret; I'm pregnant! I'm about 10 and 1/2 weeks and I'm due May 10th. I've been super tired and I've had some nausea for the last couple of weeks. The weirdest sensation is how I can't stand the smell of some things, particularly anything perfumey. I also don't want to eat some of my favourite foods.

I don't have any belly pics like Rachel yet, but I'll post some soon and I'll keep you all updated.

A Visit from Mom

My mom flew into town last night...I mean this morning. Her plane arrived at 1:30 this morning and we arrived at our apartment at 3:15. I'm not feeling too tired right now because I had some sleep before picking her up and I have today and tomorrow off so I could sleep in a bit this morning.

Scott has the car, but we may take a bus to the West Edmonton Mall today. Quite honestly it's probably the highlight for a tourist coming here. There are museums and stuff, and we live close to the legilative grounds which are nice for walking around, but if my visitors to Vancouver (my mom and my best friend, Emily) were to compare my two cities, there's much more to look at in Vancouver. I still like it better here, though. We're planning on checking out the farmer's market on Saturday and maybe we can convince Scott to come with us to Elk Island National Park for a nice walk through the woods on Sunday.

I wish we had tickets to the hockey game tonight, but it looks like we'll be watching it on t.v. instead.

Steak

We picked up our car today and it felt good to finally take a bunch of boxes to Value Village so that we have a bit more space to walk around our tiny living room. We drove out to Sherwood park to pick up Scott's friend (who normally would have driven us places) and we went to Earl's restaurant for lunch. I've been a craving steak for about a week now and it happened to be the special today so I ordered one. I don't normally order something so extravegant, but it was a special treat. It was really good. I couldn't finish it all, but I ate well beyond my comfort level simply because it tasted so good. I finally made myself stop eating, though, and I brought it home with me.

Scott is out golfing now and I had plans to do some much needed cleaning here, but my big meal made me a little tired so now I feel lazy. Maybe I'll see if there's any good movies on TV.

Cars and Hockey

Yesterday was a pretty full day. We met a friend of ours for breakfast at our new favourite restaurant, Ricki's, and then went car shopping for 4 hours. Most of the time was spent with Scott really liking specific cars and me saying, "I Guess it would be ok, until we went to the last place on Whyte Ave. It was probably the 20th Corolla we had looked at, but I finally liked it. It was the 2003 sport version, and the interior was really nice. It was around the price that we wanted to pay, it had the features we were looking for, and it was in good condition, so we got it. We're waiting for approval for financing and I think that'll be ok (I hope it will be) and we'll be able to pick it up this week once it it cleaned and certified and we have insurance. We're pretty excited to own our very first car.

After the full day of car shopping we went to Rexall place for the first hockey game in our mini-pack. We have 6 games in total, and last night's was a pre-season and the rest, of course, will be spread out through the regular season. We both agreed that the game was the least exciting of all the NHL games we'd ever been to. The Oilers were playing Calgary, so it had potential to be good, but it was sort of boring. There was no scoring in the first period and then Calgary scored twice in the last half of the second period. Edmonton finally scored in the last minute of the 3rd period so we had a minute or so of excitement, but they didn't score anymore. It doesn't really matter that they lost since it's still pre-season, but it would have been nice with some more excitement. The Flames were playing more veterans than Edmonton so it felt like watching a minor league team play an NHL team at times. The Oilers' veterans stepped it up and had more ice time at the end, though. I'm looking forward to going to the regular season games when they'll mean more and the teams will be made up of the best players and the rookies that didn't make it on the team will go back to trying to build up their skills for the next season.

Quick Update

It's been a pretty long time since I've blogged, but I've been tired when I get home from work. I basically cook supper, eat supper, and then clean up from supper. Sometimes a load of laundry is put in the wash, but I generally have been going to bed early.

I have to go to the daycare this afternoon to go through our supplies and see what we can spend some of our funding on. It doesn't sound like a fun way to spend a Saturday afternoon, but I'll be getting a free lunch.

We've been looking at options for cars lately because the transit system here is pretty inadequate and as the cold weather comes on (rather quickly, it seems) we don't want to be standing at a bus stop. Scott may go looking this afternoon while I'm out and then hopefully tomorrow I can go too. A car would make getting groceries so much easier.

My first long weekend

I haven't been very good at updating my blog lately because by the time I get home from work I'm exhausted. I've been going to bed between 8 and 9!

After working there for only a week I woke up Monday morning with a sore throat. It lasted for three days, but it never turned into anything else. No stuffy nose or anything. That was sort of a blessing, I guess.

Yesterday we got some new sharks. I'm in the shark room and it's a room for 2-3 and a half year olds. Most of the older ones moved into the sunshine room and we got the new 2 year olds. Since it was the Friday before a long weekend it was a quiet day; we only had 9 kids. It was good since it's a new routine with new rules. The new sharks coming from the chikadee room aren't used to having to scrape their own plates into the garbage after meals and they're not used to having to sit during circle time. My big thing that I want to work on with them is cleaning up the toys that they aren't playing with before moving on to new ones.

I'm so excited to have my first long weekend. I don't really know what we're going to do. Scott's talking about going to a driving range with his friend this morning and I don't know what I'll do yet. I guess I'll just relax!

New Friends

Awe...sleeping in. I'll never take it for granted again. I actually woke up around 6 and felt like I could have got up, and then again at 7. I finally crawled out of bed around 8 and I feel very rested.

So on Thursday night I went out with the girls from work to Ceili's Irish pub. It's sort of close to my apartment so I was able to walk there. After having been there for about a half an hour and half way through my Strongbow, a blonde girl came and sat across from me. I thought she was one of my co-workers friends because I didn't recognize her from the daycare. Everyone was asking her how her holidays were going and asking her if she missed the daycare, so I decided she obviously worked there. Trying to be sociable, I say, "So do you work at the daycare too?" . Everyone started laughing then and told me she was my boss, Kim, who had been on holdiays since I started. It was a very memorable way to meet my boss for the first time.
It was a lot of fun that night and I hope I didn't come across as a huge dork with Kim. I was a little bit buzzed from having a drink on an empty stomach. She actually made a comment about how I said I was shy in my interview, but I didn't seem like it now. She's got a good sense of humour, though, and she's actually just a little bit older than me.

Almost the end of the week

One more day and I will have completed my first week at the daycare. I'm so glad that this job landed on my lap; it feels so good to be doing something that I feel like I was meant to do. I still want to have a home daycare, but this environment is good until then.
I've always felt like I was called to work with children in some form. Sometimes this feeling confused me when I was growing up, though, because there were some children I babysat as a teenager that absolutely drove me nuts and I didn't want to look after. While it is still challenging at times, I've learned to cope with difficult behaviour and I think I'm pretty natural with kids. I've never been one of those loud, crazy babysitters or teachers that run around and dance with the kids all the time. I encourage the kids to do that sort of thing and when I feel comfortable I'll join in. It's part of me being introverted. I admire the out-going type who can be crazy with the kids, though.
This week so far has shown me that I'll be really happy when the time comes for me to have my own daycare at home. Since I am quieter I like to have a small group of kids so that we can get to know each other better and play and learn in an intimate atmosphere. One of the challenges I've faced this week is how loud it can sometimes get with up to 18 pre-schoolers in the room. Both the children and I get distracted by what's going on and its hard to stay focused on each other. I've noticed that the quiet children gravitate towards me, while the more extroverted ones like to play with the louder teachers. That's why I think my future small daycare will be good. It will be an option for parents whose children like interaction with others, but do better in a small group. That's what I was like as a child and still am today.
This is a pretty rambling post, but I was just typing what I thought.

First Day

It's 6:51pm and I have been home from my first daycare shift for half an hour. I'm tired. I forgot how tiring it is to work with children all day. I like it, though. The other teachers are really nice, the parents are friendly, and the kids are fun. The only stressful part was the bathroom time after lunch. I'm still alive and there were no major problems. I've been invited out to have a pint at Ceili's pub on Thursday night. Apparently it's a weekly thing, but this week will be special because the girl that I'm replacing will be saying good-bye.

Phew!

I can let out a big breath of air now. Our stuff is here, we have cable (and internet), I took my first aid/cpr course. Evrything is settling down a little. This morning I went to the daycare to meet my new coworkers and see the place. I have a feeling I'm going to be very happy there. Everyone is really nice and they seem relaxed. I chatted a lot with the assistant director. I think I'm going to "click" with everyone.

Our apartment is in shambles right now. We have boxes everywhere and things aren't in their right places yet. Our bathroom and kitchen are basically set up, but the living room and bedroom aren't functional. The bedroom is ridiculously small and we don't have a storage room so we are having a hard time arranging things. It's mostly going to have to wait, though, because tomorrow night we're taking a red-eye flight to Toronto and we'll be in Kingston on Saturday morning. I'll see most of you on Sunday at Next.

That's all for now. Our computer chair is too high and I can't figure out how to adjust it; it's making my shoulders hurt.

Updates in Edmonton

Just to update everyone on where we're at, we've been in Edmonton for a week without any of our stuff. There was a mix-up and it's going to be late. Luckily, they're reducing the price significantly for us. Nice.

We've been spending our time exploring our new surroundings and catching up with friends. We've spent some time at internet cafes (and Circuit Circus - right now) to stay in touch with our other friends. Our stuff should arrive tomorrow and we should start feeling like we live here instead of being on vacation. More to come later.

Our Weekend

I've pretty much finished packing now. All that is left is either going in the garbage or coming with us. I just have to clean now and make sure that everything is manageable for the movers. they're coming in the afternoon now instead of the morning so that gives me a little extra time. I don't think I need the extra time now, I'd rather just have them come and take stuff away. Oh well.

I just did a quick clean-up in the bathroom and I know that I'll have to do another on Monday morning just before we leave. I ran out of my Natura cleaner from Home Hardware so I used some left-over Lysol all purpose stuff instead. I have to admit that it worked incredibly well, but the fumes made me cough and I have a slight headache. I swear by natural cleaners now, even if they take a little more elbow grease to work. too bad I still have the oven to clean...

Since we're not going to have a computer or TV for the next few days we need to come up with things to keep us occupied for the weekend. I still have 1 1/2 books left to read (out of 4 - not bad, eh?) so I'll probably get them finished, but I also want to get out and see things too. We're going to go to Deep Cove on Saturday morning and have breakfast and maybe walk around a bit. It's a really pretty little town just outside of North Vancouver, right by Mount Seymour Provincial Park. I doubt that we'll do any major hiking, though, because our running shoes have already been packed. After that, I'd like to go to The Plaza of Nations downtown and check out the "Taste of the City" festival. It's free admission and you get to sample food from hundreds (I might be exaggerating) of restaurants. Then, when we're all stuffed, the second night of the Fireworks competition will be happening in English Bay (where we live) and we'll go check them out. Everyone in Vancouver and the surrounding area comes down for them. It's pretty crazy.

Swimming

The humidity has tapered off here and I am so relieved. It's still pretty warm during the day, especially since I've been working hard, but it's tolerable once I take it easy. Scott and I went for a swim in the ocean the other day and the water was perfect; a little cold at first, but great once we were used to it. I wanted to go again tonight so I convinced Scott to go with me at around 7:30. The water was freezing tonight, but again, once we were used to it we stayed in for a long time. Our skin was cold to the touch for at least an hour afterwards, though, since it was pretty cold. The tide was high tonight so I'm guessing that's why it was so much colder. The water was so much more shallow when we went last time.

So I have my start date at the daycare. I'll be there for the 21st; the Monday after we get back from Kingston. As soon as I read the email tonight I became a little anxious. This is real...a real job. I hope I don't suck. I've always had a passion for working with kids and I'd say it's my niche. I'm just worried about things like whether I'll have chemistry with my co-workers or the parents. Sometimes my introverted personality makes things difficult.

Getting there...

The packing is coming along now, but I'm really looking forward to the unpacking part. I've always enjoyed that part so much more since I get to set up my home.

We don't have a lot of groceries right now because we are trying to use up what we have already. There wasn't much breakfast food (that I like) so I decided to go out for breakfast. There are a lot of restaurants right outside our door so I chose one for a cheap meal. It was great, I only spent $4, tip included. After our stuff leaves next Friday and we're still here for 2 days we'll be eating at the cheap restaurants on Denman Street. We'll have our cheap greasy spoon breakfast, the lunch special at Mongolian BBQ, and likely sushi for supper. We're both getting a little tired of sushi, though, so we might have to think of something else that's inexpensive.

I took some free newspapers from our front door today (the ones that usually end up sitting there until the janitor throws them in the recycling) and I plan to pack up my kitchen today. I don't plan on entertaining anyone or cooking any big meals between now and next Friday so I think it's a good idea. I don't like how things are half packed right now. It's too messy.

Summer Reading List

I just got back from the library with 4 books. Three of them are trashy romances with hopefully some rippling muscles and ripping bodices. The other is a Margaret Laurence novel. After high school I didn't think I'd ever try to read another one of her's, but this one sounds interesting. Can I read 4 books in a week and a half? Absolutely. Will I? We'll see.

Packing

Packing is hard work. I want to pack everything all in one shot instead of only some of it because I still need stuff. If I was a millionaire I'd have other people doing it all for me, I'd be staying at a luxurious hotel for the next week and a half, and I'd be eating at a different restaurant every night. But alas, I'm far from a millionaire so I'm doing it myself. The work itself isn't so bad, in fact, it's somewhat therapeutic. Organizing things neatly in a box is up my alley, deciding what to leave out and when I should pack certain items, not so much.
I find myself taking a lot of breaks. It's pretty hot in our apartment, especially when you're doing something labour intensive so I sit down for a while by the fan to cool off, then I get back up and do something else until I'm uncomfortable again.
I feel like I want to read these days since I'm not working anymore, but I've packed up all my books. I didn't have any that I wanted to read again, though, so I'll try to get to the library. I love the idea of going to the library, but I tend to get a sore neck and my eyes go fuzzy from reading things sideways on the shelves. I always find tons of books I'm interested in at Chapters because so many are all set out in front of me in a nice display with their front covers facing out. I'm drawn to nice covers. Later I might go to find an easy-read fiction. I can't let myself forget to take it back. Last night since I wanted to read, I decided to read the Bible. It's sad to say that I read it because I didn't have anything else to read. I decided to read Peter I and II as though they were a novel. Maybe some divine intervention caused me to want to read them because I did get some inspiration from them. There were some really good passages that I could relate to. On the other hand though, there were some things in there that talked of how live for Jesus and it made me think that I'm not really a good Christian. So then I went to bed and tried to meditate on what I had read and to think of ways to incorporate Christ into my life a little better. I'll save Revelations for a night when I feel better about my moral state LOL.

I finished my last shift on Saturday and now I've got a little less than two weeks to pack up our stuff and get ready to move. I'm getting really excited to get to Edmonton and get settled in our new place. The day of the move will be slightly hectic as we get our luggage and the cats to the airport to fly. We'll have to arrange to have someone pick us up at the airport in Edmonton since it's too long of a cab ride downtown. The airport is outside the city.
On Friday at work they had a surprise going away party and it was really sweet. I didn't think I had been there long enough to get one, but they had a cake and everything. People wrote really nice messages in a card for me too. That night I decided to go out with a couple of the girls that work in the gift registry since one of them lives across the street from me. I thought it would be ok to have a couple drinks with them since they had asked me so many times before but I always said no. It was a lot of fun, but I ended up drinking more than I'm used to and I felt really sick when I got home and didn't sleep well. My actual last shift was Saturday and it wasn't very enjoyable because of the night before.
Since we weren't going to be here for very long I didn't try to make any strong connections with people, but I realized that I'm going to miss some of the people I've met more than I expected. I've been so focused on moving on that I haven't been able to enjoy my time that I've had here. I'm glad we came here.
I'm hoping that when we get to Edmonton we'll find a church that we both like and I can connect with people there. I've really missed having a church that I feel comfortable in. I miss being with people and hearing messages that really make me think. I really hope to find a small group too since that was one of the best things that happened for me when I was in Kingston. Things just never really fell into place that way here.

Sorry for the lack of posting. Zeek is much better now; I don't really know what happened. He was curled up uncomfortably all night, but by morning he and Tyke were running around and playing as usual.
I've been both lazy and busy at the same time. I've been busy with trying to find an apartment in Edmonton, finishing up my last few shifts at work, and meeting friends to say good-bye. When I haven't been doing these things I've been super lazy.
I have the day off tomorrow and there is some serious house maintenance that needs to be done. The basic stuff like vacuuming, cleaning the bathroom and doing the dishes has been neglected.
We have an apartment now; we just need to find out more details about it. I talked to the property management group and we were told that we're appoved for the place and the woman told me that she called the property manager and told him to call us. She said that she called him on Friday, but we still haven't heard from him. Scott tried calling him today, but had no luck. I'll feel much better once we talk to him and he tells us that we do in fact have an apartment. On the phone last week he sounded both confused and grumpy. Once we know our address we can start changing the address on things and transfer our cable over so we can have internet as soon as we arrive.

By the way, that's the picture we have of the afore-mentioned apartment.

I'm worried about Zeek. He's been lying this way tonight and if you even gently touch his side he wimpers. We've had trouble with him and hairballs for a long time since his hair is so long, but he tends to throw up and then continue playing around as usual. I've also never know him to be in pain. He threw up, and he doesn't seem to be able to walk. He takes a few steps and then lies down. As I write this he has just gone into his box and is lying down in there. I hope he's ok. If he's still like this tomorrow we may need to take him to the vet.

I took the job!
I couldn't turn down such a good opportunity being handed to me so I decided it was a good idea. If it doesn't work out, so be it, but I need to try it. It could be the best job I've ever had.

Who'd have thought?

I checked my email tonight and discovered that I've been offered the job at the daycare. I started reading it fully expecting to say that she enjoyed speaking to me, but she'd offered the job to someone else, but I was taken aback when I read that they thought I'd fit in well. I got a little "sour grapes" after the interview since I thought it went so poorly. I started thinking of the size and how far away it was, but now that it's right there for me if I want it, I'm thinking of the good things like the regular hours, the better pay, paid holidays, and the satisfaction with working with kids. The cons are still there, of course. At this point the one that bugs me most is how far away it is. I don't know Edmonton's transit system so I don't know how easy it would be to get there. I've decided to think and pray about it and respond tomorrow.

I haven't heard back from the daycare yet, but I have a feeling that if I do, they'll tell me they gave the job to someone else. I'm fine with that. As I thought about it more, I realized that it's probably better to find one that is smaller and closer to where we are going to be living.

We've found a potential apartment on the south side of Edmonton so we're going to send our friend Stuart there to check it out. It's a 2 bedroom and way cheaper than what we pay now. It also has a dishwasher which would come in handy if I end up getting a full time job somewhere.

I've been thinking a little more about packing and I'm looking forward to getting started. Everything is at a stand still now and it doesn't feel like we're moving because I'm not doing anything in preparation now. I have a little under 2 weeks left of work and 7 shifts. After this last weekend I'm looking forward to the end.

I just finished my interview and my stomach is still in knots. I got nervous. I think it went ok, but I kept using the term "kids" instead of "children" by accident. I was trained well in college to say the correct thing and I've lost the habit. I think I may have sounded a little unprofessional because of it. She seemed to like the answers I gave, though. She said she has a couple more interviews and needs to check my references and she'll call back within a couple of days. I forgot how nerve-racking this is.

Sweet Dreams

Dreams are so intriguing to me. Ever since my dad passed away I've dreamt that he wasn't actually gone and he comes back to life and I get to see him again. These dreams always make me so happy and then so sad when I wake up. The irony is that in the days and weeks after he passed I kept wishing it was all a dream and that I'd wake up to find him alive. Now I find him alive in my dreams.
I don't know what it means, though. Can souls who have passed and souls that are still here still interact through dreams? Are dreams our common place? Or is this just my subconscious wishing?
My dad was in my dream last night, and although things that were said between us were vague, his presence was consoling with both what was happening in the dream and something that has been bothering me in real life too.
I wish I knew what dreams were. I wish I knew if they were just explained through science, or if there is some depth to them that as humans we can't grasp. I've had some pretty intense things happen to me while dreaming and even when I am half dreaming, like sleep paralysis . I used to have the paralysis happen to me almost nightly for a while and it was terrifying. Although it's explained as something quite normal, it only happened when I lived with Scott and Shaun and that house on Collingwood Street; a house where really weird things happened. It made it feel less normal.
In the Bible God would communicate with people through dreams, which makes me believe there is something more to them than just neurology. I could easily link my dad being alive in my dreams to when God renews life and creates a new world. It almost seems to easy to make that connection, though.
Does anyone have any thoughts on this? I really want to know what other people think.

Frappuccino and Daycares

We had someone coming to look at our apartment this afternoon so, instead of making the potential tenant feel awkward about opening up closets, I decided to leave. Since our apartment is a greenhouse and it's a nice sunny day, I walked down to English Bay Beach. I stopped to look at some clothes at a couple shops a long the way. I'm not usually a Starbucks customer, and although there is one on almost every corner here, I haven't bought into the craze. Today though, I was enticed by them to try their banana coconut frappuccino. So I went in, feeling quite out of place with my casual jogging shorts and out-of-style shirt and ordered my "tall banana-coconut frap" and walked down to the beach. I enjoyed the first few sips of it and the whipped cream with coconut flakes on top. I sat on a bench in the shade for a while since I wasn't wearing sunscreen and sipped on my cold drink. I started to feel a little cool from the breeze off the ocean, though, and decided to go home. As I was walking my stomach started to feel uncomfortable and my drink had lost it's appeal. I paid $4 for a stomach ache and a bad taste in mouth.

In other news, I applied for a position at a daycare in Edmonton today. It's an idea I've been toying with for a while now, but I'm quite intimidated by the thought of being back in a daycare since I've had very little exposure to kids in the last 2 years. I decided it was worth a shot since it would give me a normal Monday to Friday schedule and the money would be better. Besides, it's much more rewarding to work with kids than to sell china. I told them I'd be available at the end of August since we'll be visiting Ontario the third week and I need to re-take my first aid and cpr. Because of that I'm not really expecting to hear back from them, but at the same time I have the highest level of training for Alberta standards and they might really want me because of that. We'll see what happens. Pray that the right thing will happen for me.

I've started setting aside things that we don't want or need and I've organized as much as I can before we have a new address in Edmonton. We had our first potential tenant come in to look at our apartment today so now begins the craziness of constantly keeping this place spic and span...no slacking for me! Hopefully someone rents it soon so we can relax and I don't have to worry about messes as I go through junk. Our property manager told us that she wants to replace our carpet which thrills me because then we don't have to get it cleaned.

Something I'm looking forward to in Edmonton is no more humidity! It's nowhere near as humid as Ontario, but still not exactly comfortable. The sun heats up the apartment in the mornings and it stays warm for most of the day.

Yesterday we went to Third Beach, my favourite beach here, and found out that there isn't much to do when the water is cold. We didn't have books, which would have been nice, so we just lay under our little beach tent for a while. We did go down to the water (quite a walk at low tide!) and walked in to our knees. It was pretty cold, though.

We were pretty sad about the Oilers losing last night. As dissapointed as I was about the loss, I was more upset for Scott and the team itself for how they were feeling. Let's face it, I've only been a fan for 5 years and Scott's been bleeding Oiler blue for most of his life. I wanted them to win for him. At least in a week or so Scott, the Oilers, and the rest of the fans will be able to appreciate how amazing the run was and that they get another shot at it next season. So I've put my jersey away for the next 3 months and craziness will start again.

Now that the play offs are done our life will go back to normal. Or at least as normal as it can be with a big moving coming up in a few weeks. We're really excited about getting there. The preparations can be a little hectic, but it'll all work out. We know when we're moving so now we just have to book movers, carpet cleaners, buy plane tickets, get rid of some of our stuff, and cancel services. Lots to do, but I'm up for the challenge. The good thing is that as much as it's all going to cost us, Edmonton is a cheaper city so things will feel nicer when we get there.

I'm really glad to be moving during the summer so that we have good weather. Summer doesn't last too long in Northern Alberta, but it'll be nice to get some time to get outside and enjoy what's left of it. I haven't been there in the winter yet, so I don't really know what to expect. Apparently the cold is a dry cold so it's not as bad as the wet cold of the east. Also, the sun is often out in the winter to brighten the day.

Holy smokes. So we're moving to Edmonton in about 6 weeks. Scott found out yesterday and came to give me the news of his transfer at work. Needless to say, I was pretty excited. My mind is going crazy with all the stuff that needs to be done and I can't wait to get started on everything. I love arranging the movers, looking for apartments and buying plane tickets. The only part I don't look forward to is spending all the money and the packing. But even part of me is looking forward to that. I already have moving companies calling me to offer free quotes (I requested them, of course)and trying to get our business.

I don't know a lot yet. I think my last day of work will be July 19th and we'll move as close to July 31st as possible. I'll post more once I know more details. This is very exciting. Too bad we can't be there for Saturday night!

Passion

(I know, it's a dorky picture)

We eat, sleep, and breathe hockey here in the Feenstra residence, but more specifically it's the Edmonton Oilers. It wasn't always that way for me, though, I have Scott to thank for introducing this kind of passion to me.

I grew up in a family where we'd watch Hockey Night in Canada every Saturday night. We'd go to the evening mass and usually my cousins would come over after and we'd watch what was left of the game. I watched a lot of Toronto games since they were the early ones, but I didn't care for them. In fact, I'm still somewhat indifferent to the Leafs. My cousins were Montreal fans and I remember really disliking them. I don't really have a reason, I just remember my friend and I talking about the Canadiens and discussing what a poor team they were. It's probably because we didn't think there were enough cute boys on the team. I may have been young, but I never went through the "boys are gross" stage.

So I grew up watching hockey, but never really had a favourite team. At one point I liked the Flames, but I think it was because my sister claimed to like them (I'm sure it also had to do with a boy she liked), but she doesn't care for hockey now. I found myself cheering for the team who was losing quite often too, so who I cheered for often changed. In grade 4 I had a big crush on Jacob Murphy and he liked the Oilers so my allegiance went there for a while then. That's when they were in their glory days, but I wasn't as aware of that then.

Scott and I met when I went to hang out with his then housemate, Shaun, an avid Leafs fan. It was during the 2001 play offs and Toronto was playing New Jersey. I didn't really care about the series, but it was fun to watch hockey with people, especially Shaun because he gets a little crazy watching Toronto. Scott, of course, was an Oilers fan, and didn't care about the Toronto/New Jersey game either, but he watched a bit of the games with us. When New Jersey made it to the final against Colorado, Scott and I made a bet on the outcome. I bet on New Jersey, and he was convinced that Colorado would win. He was right, of course and I was out some money. Scott and I quickly became friends and when I lived with him and Shaun I started listening to and watching games with Scott. His passion and excitement was infectious so it was hard not to cheer for the Oilers for him and see him so elated when they won. I started to get to know the players and the coaching staff, to understand the game better, and to know the rivalries. Before long, I was also a massive fan. It was exciting hockey, the team was passionate, hard-working, and determined. They didn't do very well the first few years that I liked them, but they still played great, exciting hockey. Once Scott and I started dating and I moved out, it became even more fun. We'd meet to watch games and we really bonded over the experiences. I think it was 2002 when I got to go to my first game. Scott, his parents, and I went to Ottawa when the Oilers were in town and we went down to ice level to watch the pre-game skate and I got to see all the faces of the men I'd heard so much about. At the time I really liked Ryan Smyth and Shaun Horcoff. I was so thrilled when after the skate Ryan Smyth scooped up some pucks and threw them over the glass for fans. He does this at every game; usually he throws them to kids, but I don't think there were any around me so I caught it and had an awesome souvenir from my first game. They went on to win that night too. What a great first experience.

I don't think there's any turning back for me now. I'm hooked. I can't believe I missed out on all this excitment before I met Scott! I can't wait to live in Edmonton one day and we'll likely have a package deal of going to a bunch of games, and we'll be able to watch all the games on TV if we're not there. And the pay-per-view games that won't be on TV, we can watch at the movie theatre. Isn't that cool?!

You know where I'll be at 8pm ET tonight. We'll be here cheering on our team and hoping they can win, fight through the adversity that they've faced and win the Stanley Cup. It's so close.

Once again, I say I'd like to be paid to be a housewife instead of a sales associate.

This morning I woke up with a stomach ache before I had to go to work. It's something that has plagued me all my life. When I get up a little earlier than usual, my body protests and tries to come up with ways to make me go back to bed. Sometimes it works. In most cases, though, if I just put up with it I feel better within a couple of hours. This morning was one of the times I decided to suffer through it. I knew I'd feel better a little later so there was no point in staying home because I'd end up feeling guilty if I didn't continue to have a stomach ache all day. So I had just a piece of toast for breakfast and took the bus instead of walk.

It turns out I should have just stayed home. Work was ridiculously busy for a Monday and it seemed like it was one problem after another. On top of that, customers were somewhat nasty today and I didn't enjoy myself. My dept. head was supposed to work today, but she sprained her ankle on her way to work so we were short-staffed for a while and I didn't get to take my break for a long time. Since I only had a slice of dry toast for breakfast I was feeling a little weak by the time I finally got to eat something. My boss asked me if I could cover the shift tomorrow since the woman with the sprained ankle likely wouldn't be well enough to work, and I said yes. I have a lot of errands and other things that I need to do on my day off, but I didn't think it would be a big deal because I thought I had Wednesday off. I was wrong and I don't get day off until Friday. Not a huge deal, but a long time to put off the things that I need to do and possibly difficult to fit them in.

Right now I'm waiting for my soup to cool off enough so I can put it in the fridge. Scott was saying how he wanted some nice home-cooked meals this week so I made a big pot of beef vegetable soup in the slow-cooker (I actually did it a little faster on high during the hockey game) and he can have it for supper tomorrow when I'm still at work.

I'm tired already.

The FDA has just approved a vaccine for cervical cancer in the US. It works by protecting women from HPV, a virus that can lead to the cancer. Apparently their targeted demographic is women/girls between the ages of 9-26. I don't see any reason why Canada won't eventually follow suit within a few years either. On the MSN website there was a link to an article about it and a discussion started on whether people will want their daughters vaccinated. I'm not sure what to say about it, I haven't thought about it much.
In an ideal world, if we have daughters they will only be intimate with their husbands and their husband only with them, but that may be naive to believe that will happen (although we'll still encourage that in our children). On the other hand, I don't want my daughters to have cancer and if I could prevent it, I would want to. But does a vaccination lead to a false sense of security in people? What about all the other STD's that are out there? It just seems like people are constantly looking for ways to allow them to be more irresponsible. No one wants consequences.
How do you feel about it?

I'm going to be all alone in our apartment on Saturday night for the first time since we've lived here when Scott flies to Edmonton to watch the hockey game. I have to work that day (pout) so I'll come home, put on my jersey, order some Thai food, and yell at the TV all by myself. I think it could be fun, I just hope that the outcome is good so Scott really has a lot of fun and gets to celebrate with all the crazy Oilers fans on Whyte Ave. I don't think he'll be burning any telephone booths, though.

On Sunday I'm going to get up and go to church at the Alliance church that I sometimes go to and then I'm not sure what to do. I'm sure at some point I'll end up cleaning cat litter or doing the dishes. Then I'll go to the airport to greet Scott and have some Harvey's. It's the only one I know of so we've made it a bit of a ritual to go there for veggie burgers and onion rings with honey. Or at least that's what I'll get.

Sharks

There's so much talk about dreams on other peoples' blogs that I felt I should share my mind's nocturnal musing from last night. I dreamt that Scott and I were at the aquarium here and while I thought I was going to watch the dolphins, they turned out to be sharks. The viewing area for the show was open to the water and the water lapped up at our feet and I could see that the pool was at an incline like at a children's wading pool. Still thinking that I was about to see dolphins, I was going to sit down right at the water's edge, but one of the trainers told me to sit on the steps a little to my left. Just as I sat down I saw the sharks speeding towards us and one of them came right up beside me, brushing me as he came by and then wriggled back into the water. It scared the crap out of me, but I found out that they had been trained to do that and that there was no danger. It didn't make me feel any better. Curious, I looked it up in the online dream dictionary and this is what it said:

"To see a shark in your dream, represents a person whom you see as greedy and unscrupulous. This person goes after what what he or she wants with no regards to the well-being and sensitivity of others. The shark may also be an aspect of your own personality which exhibit these qualities. Alternatively, you may be going through a difficult, painful, or unpleasant emotional period. The shark symbolizes feelings of anger, hostility, and fierceness. You may be an emotional threat to yourself or to others."

I found it kind of intense. I think I might have just seen a shark on tv or something and not noticed. Or maybe I'm subconciously scared of dolphins.

By the way, I couldn't resist the picture. I googled sharks for a picture and inevitably came across pictures like the one above so I thought it was funny. It's for Al.

My shifts have increased at the store lately and it's left me with two precious days off. I didn't do as much as I should have yesterday as far as housework goes, and now I have to do it all today. I like to have at least one day a week when I don't have to do anything at all, but if my apartment is messy I can't really relax. I've been putting off the laundry, cleaning the bathroom, and cleaning out the fridge. I hate those chores.

I got some new books from the library last night (I think I need to give up on Crime and Punishment). I got Good Bones by Margaret Atwood and The Promise by Pearl S. Buck. I thought The Promise was going to be the same story as the Mandarin movie that I wanted to see in the theatre, but now I'm not so sure. Either way, I started reading it and I wasn't crazy about the author's style of writing and I had a hard time focusing. I had to keep going back and re-reading parts because I didn't know what was going on.

I have to go do housework now!

3 years

It was a beautifully perfect rainy day three years ago today that I married the most perfect man for me on the porch of my in-laws house with our 34 guests. I can't believe it's already been three years. It was such a perfect day and it's been a perfect three years. Happy anniversary, Sweetie!

Busy

Work has really picked up now! It's wedding season again so we have some blushing brides and some bridezillas around as well as their lovely guests. I'm working a lot more lately which is good for the pocket book, but not so good for my other job of being a housewife. I had the weekend off with Scott (much to the chagrin of my dept. head) because tomorrow is our 3rd anniversary and we wanted a nice relaxing weekend together. We didn't go out of town like we usually do, but we had a great time in the city. On Saturday, we went to dinner at Sammy J. Peppers after spending the afternoon walking around Coal Harbour and going to see The Da Vinci Code (neither of us were impressed by it). On Sunday, we did more walking, but this time we started out on Scott's favourite trail in Stanley Park, stopped at the aquarium to check out the belugas, sea lion, sea otters, and seals, and then went for lunch at Red Robin. We had to get home in time to watch the hockey game, of course, and it was obviously great.

It's good that I had the weekend off with Scott because tomorrow is one of those rare days when I won't see Scott since he's working at 4am. When I'm leaving for work, he'll be coming home and he'll likely be asleep when I get back. It used to happen a lot more often.

Time for change

I managed to get rid of my shift for tonight, but not without jumping through a lot of hoops first. I couldn't switch with someone as I had liked, instead I had to just give it away to someone and lose a few hours. I didn't have a choice.

I didn't have a good day at work yesterday and it left me feeling upset. Things happened, and have been happening there, with my superiors that don't jive well with me. I've always admired people with integrity and principles, but I'm feeling like there are a few people that aren't showing those qualities and it makes it hard to enjoy myself. I think it's time to find a different job. That's a hard decision for me to make because I don't mind the work that I have to do and I get along well with my co-workers. I don't know how quickly I'll find somthing, though, because I need to find something that suits my lifestyle. I still want to be able to be a good housewife. It makes me wish we just had a house so I could do my home daycare like we've been planning. I've done some praying and I feel like it's going to be ok. I don't know if I'm going to find something ideal or if things will just improve where I am, but I'm not as worried as I could be.

I can't believe how warm it is here. It's definitely time to start wearing sunscreen when I walk to work. I managed to get out yesterday after I did all my housework in the morning. I got started on it kind of late because, as my dad used to say, I "had a lazy on". I wanted to get out to buy a couple gift cards for my brother and his wife for their birthdays coming up, but I couldn't go where I wanted to to since it turns out that St. John has fewer stores than Vancouver does. I settled on the big stores of Sears and Canadian Tire. I hopped on the bus to get to Canadian Tire after walking downtown thinking that it would be a very quick bus ride over the bridge, but with the construction for the Canada Line Skytrain everything is out of whack and it wasn't very direct. I had a moment of panic thinking that I got on the wrong bus, but it all turned out. It was a very short ride back downtown, though and I got off the bus right by Scott's place of work hoping he'd be done, but he wasn't. I went home instead and got supper ready for us. I'm so glad he's working from downtown now instead of an hour away. It's nice when he calls to say he's on his way home and shows up 15 minutes later!

I'm very anxious today because I found out the hockey game tomorrow night will be on when I'm at work. I'm desperately trying to switch shifts, but there aren't a lot of people available to take it. Two people, actually. One person has already said she can't so I'm praying that I can work something out today. I guess it won't be the end of the world if I have to miss it, but I'll be somewhat bitter if I have to be at work during game six when I think the Oilers will be eliminating the Sharks. I keep telling myself that it's ok because if the Oilers win I can watch them in the next round and if they lose then I probably don't want to see it. The crappy part is that if they lose and there's a game 7 then I'm also working that night. It's hard not to say bad words.

I'm almost 100%, I'm a day to day decision. I think I can play today though, my nose was feeling pretty good at the morning skate....oh wait, I'm not a hockey player.

I'm pretty excited about tonight's game 5 of the Edmonton/San Jose series. I just finished reading some articles and I got somewhat pumped. Luckily, I'll be home from work in time to watch the game. I'm really hoping it doesn't go to 7 games, ideally the Oilers can do it in 6 because then I'd have to switch my Friday shift with someone and I'd rather not do that since she said she'd prefer to not work that night, but would if I needed her to. I dreamt this morning that I was a on a bus with Kevin Lowe (the Oilers' GM) and I told him that I was sure they would win the series. He said that sounded reasonable.

This morning I sneezed about 15 times in a row. It reminds me of one time when I was little and had started a sneezing fit. I was sort of laughing with my mom in between them until I hit about 5 and kept going. I started to cry then because I thought I would sneeze forever. My mom probably started laughing even more.

Getting Better

My cold is starting to go away now and that makes me happy. I didn't go to work yesterday because I was feeling too crappy. If I had a job where I didn't have to interact with people I would have considered going anyway, but I was pretty gross. I still sort of am. I'm going to cook a nice healthy dinner anyway tonight because sometimes when I'm not feeling great I don't feel like cooking and therefore and up eating poorly and not helping myself. I'm going to make "Creamy Corn and Garlic Risotto". It sounds pretty good and it looks pretty easy to make. I got the recipe from my Betty Crocker Quick and Easy Cookbook. I've got some pretty good ideas from it...Scott may not be happy with everything though.

Scott and went to Chapters today so that he could look for a specific magazine and I wanted to look at the Max Lucado books since Aphra reccommended his work. I requested Come Thirsty from the library, but When God Whispers Your Name wasn't available so I wanted to see what it was about at the bookstore. They didn't have it either. On the topic of books; I finished the Mother Theresa book and I really liked it. Now I have to keep working on Crime and Punishment. Along with the Max Lucado book, I also requested The Chrysalids. It was one that I was supposed to read in high school, but only read about half of it. I think I might appreciate it more now that I'm older. Listening to the discussions about it in class and hearing what happens in the end makes it more interesting to me. Sci-Fi isn't usually my style, but I'll try to get through it again.

My life hasn't been very exciting lately so there hasn't been much to put in my blog.

Scott's on holidays this week which is really nice for him; too bad he's sick, though. He's been coughing and blowing his nose a lot since the weekend and is just miserable. I have a sore throat too, but I think it's going to stay as just that. If I suddenly get worse tomorrow and I start making the horrible noises that Scott is then I'll have to tell work I can't make it tomorrow night since most brides don't want me touching their nice wedding china with my germs.

Today we put a pink collar with a bell on Mishka because she keeps peeing on the floor in the bathroom and we hope the bell will help us catch her in the act. We know it's her because it happened when it was just me and her living alone together before I was married and I've been litter trained. She has too, but she's spiteful or something. She doesn't really like the bell and she thinks if she turns her head really fast she can catch it.

Tomorrow morning we're hoping to go to Lynn Valley and hang out by the stream. It's a nice area in the mountains where we can go for hikes and check out waterfalls.

Reading

I love exploring bookstores and the library. There are always so many books that I want to read and broaden my views. I have a huge collection of children's books that I've purchased over the years so that I can read to my kids and hopefully make readers out of them.

The problem is, I like the idea of reading. Even when I absolutely love a book, it takes me ages to read it because I'm not always motivated to sit down with a book. There can't be anything else around to distract me. Right now I'm reading Crime and Punishment and I really like it. For those of you who haven't read it, I recommend it. I also picked up No Greater Love by Mother Theresa. I went to the library the other day in search of a Max Lucado book like Aphra suggested, but I'll need to request a copy since my little library didn't have it. I'm already half done Mother Theresa's book; it's an easy read and also really good.

When I was in high school I took as many English courses as I could because I always did well in them (compared to any math and sciences, but I rarely finished the books. Most of the time I would read part of them and then either watch the movie or ask people about the important parts. If the book was in French, though, I didn't even bother reading it. I don't know how I ever passed those classes. I think I did well in English because I was good at taking the important parts of the books that I knew about and writing an essay about them. All you have to do with essays is prove a point, right? I think I'd get an A in BS-ing. The two books I did finsh and really enjoyed were Far From the Madding Crowd and The Mill on the Floss. The latter I chose for an independent study and my teacher was really impressed since it was so long. The story was sort of slow, but turned out to be pretty good.

My goal is to read more. I always feel better after I finish a book and I love how I learn interesting things. I learned some really cool historical stuff from my Scottish romance books! The ironic thing is that Scott really likes to read, but when we play Jeopardy on the computer I always kick his butt in the literature categories. But that's it. He always beats me by an embarassing amount.

My mom passed this website on to me to raise awareness about how bottled water companies are taking the water from poor communities, causing harm to the environment, and being socially irresponsible in general. I haven't done very much research on it yet, but what my mom told me about it makes me think. I drink bottled water exclusively because I don't like how my tap water tastes (and it turns my bath tub flourescent blue).

http://www.insidethebottle.org/

Breathing

There are few cds that I can just lie down and listen to without needing to be busied by anything else, and Lifehouse's No Name Face is one. Their singles are released on the radio and sound quite secular when you first hear them, but if you really examine the lyrics and then listen to the entire album, you realize that they are in fact, Christian. It turns out that they were a Christian band before they were released as mainstream. I have a couple of their cd's and No Name Face is my favourite. I bought it when I was going through a particularly difficult time and found it really spiritual. At the time I was learning how to trust God and rely on Him for helping me through challenges.

I've always used music to comfort, energize, or relax me, and it's nice to also have songs that can help me connect with God.

Here are the lyrics to my favourite song on No Name Face; it's called "Breathing".

I'm finding my way back to sanity again
Though I don't really know what i'm gonna do when i get there
I take a breath and hold on tight
Spin around one more time
And gracefully fall back to the arms of grace

Cause I am hanging on every word you're saying
Even if you don't wanna speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me
Cause I want nothing more than to sit outside heaven's door
And listen to you breathing
Its where i wanna be, yeah
Where I wanna be

I'm looking past the shadows in my mind into the truth
And i'm trying to identify the voices in my head
God, which one's you
Let me feel one more time what if feels like to feel
And break these caluses off me one more time

Cause I am hanging on every word you're saying
Even if you don't wanna speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me
Cause I want nothing more than to sit outside of your door
And listen to you breathing
Its where I wanna be, yeah

Oh i don't want a thing from you
Bet you're tired of me waiting for
The scraps to fall off of your table to the ground
La da da da...
Cause i just wanna be here now

Cause I am hanging on every word you're saying
Even if you don't wanna speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me
Cause I want nothing more than to sit outside heaven's door
And listen to you breathing
Its where i wanna be, yeah
Where I wanna be

Cause I am hanging on every word you're saying
Even if you don't wanna speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me
Cause I want nothing more than to sit outside heaven's door
And listen to you breathing
Its where i wanna be, yeah
Where I wanna be

My Rant

I'm a pretty laid back person in general, but there's one thing that gets me really angry and that is people's blatant disregard for the environment. Everyone has heard about global warming, recycling and the dangers of pesticides, but no one really does much to help the earth out. When I watch the news and I hear about the things like the very real possibility of polar bears becoming extinct it actually brings me close to tears. The government is no help at all either. Bush wants to lift the moratorium that Clinton placed on oil drilling up North, and Harper wants to back away from Kyoto and do his own thing. I know that Kyoto isn't perfect and if it works, will bring only emmisions back to where they were back in the 90's when they were already a problem, but it's something. If he doesn't think it's going to be effective, why doesn't he just add these other policies that he thinks are so great on top of Kyoto?
Bush says that if the moratorium was lifted then the price of oil would significantly decrease. This doesn't sound like someone who wants to explore renewable resources and reduce dependence on oil like he has claimed (He may have said foreign oil, but if he gets his way and drills for oil in our North it's still foreign).

If gas prices stay where they are maybe it will make people think twice about driving as often as they do and espcecially about driving the gas-guzzling SUV's and Hummers I see everywhere here in Vancouver.

Sometimes I just feel at a loss. I know I'm not perfect when it comes to caring for the environment, but a lot of my decisions are made with the earth in mind. Why can't other people just see the importance of this? Why do the majority of people continue to mock environmentalists and call us "hippies" and "granola crunchers"?

A Walk in the Park

It's so gorgeous outside right now! Even though I might not be out there much today due to housework, I'm loving having all the wondows open and the sun shining in. Scott and I went for a walk in Stanley Park on the weekend and it was really nice. We hadn't gone for a walk there when it hasn't been raining in a long time so it was a nice change. The forest looks really nice with the sun shining through the trees on the moss. I'm hoping it stays nice right into next weekend so we can get out and enjoy it some more.

So I'm not quite the girl next door, according to Cosmo...

Out of boredom, I took an online quiz from a magazine to find out "how sexy my style" is and it turns out I'm "subtly sexy". I don't know if I agree neccesarily, but there didn't seem to be a lot of options for me. The very first question was: What's your bathing suit preferance? A) a one piece with a wrap, B) bikini bottoms, or C) a tankini. I had to laugh when in the little paragraph at the end of the quiz summin up who I am they said, "...but since money doesn't grow on trees, you have perfected the art of paring a pricey jacket back to a sexy halter top from the good old Gap". A halter top from the Gap would be too much money! Besides, don't get me started on the Gap's image...
Oh yeah, and my style twin is Jennifer Aniston...I doubt it.

A nice day

I think I heard rain at some point during the night or early this morning, but by the time I woke up the sun was shining and the birds were singing. Not a bad thing to wake up to on a day off. When I went out this morning I decided it was time to wear my flip-flops and try to break them in again for the summer months. I recall last year when I bought them and went through a pack of blister Band-Aids really quickly. It was so nice out and my feet weren't cold at all during my short walk towards the beach that when I went to the doctor's office this afternoon I wore my flip-flops again, but it had clouded over and my feet did get cold. It's ok, though. Although I was cold, I'm happy to say that I didn't get any blisters.

It kind of stunk that I had to wait for the bus for a super-long time, though, and eventually had to walk to a different bus stop because it seemed like the small bus I wanted to take wasn't coming. There was a sign at the stop about how as of April 24th bus service will be changed because of the construction of the Canada Line skytrain in preparation for the Olympics, but it didn't say anything about the bus I wanted today...but it never came. Instead I got on the crowded Davie bus and had to stand with my groceries. I made it my groceries and I are all in one piece.

Can anyone tell me why Zeek, our way-too-furry cat thinks it's such a good idea to cough up hairballs everywhere except the easy-to-clean linoleum floors? More specifically, in my slippers...

Well, time for me to stop eating Easter chocolate and cook a healthy supper to cancel out the chocolate.

Does anybody have any suggestions for good books about connecting with God. Maybe something specific to women. I've been feeling like a bad Christian lately and I feel like I need something that will refocus by spirit. I haven't been to church in weeks because I haven't felt motivated. The few churches I've ventured to here haven't really filled me up like I would have liked. There is one church in South Van that's not too bad, but I'm not crazy with how long they sing before they start the service. I end up going late so that I get there for the message instead of all the singing, but I feel rude doing that. It's also not that close so since I'm not motivated, it takes more for me to get there. I feel like I'm becoming materialistic and shallow because my priorities haven't been where they should be.

Could you send some prayers so that Scott and I could find a church that we both like and feel comfortable in? It would be really nice to connect with some people here.

Spring!

Spring has arrived! We're seeing fewer rainy days now and the sun is finally trying to make itself more noticeable and warmer. We've had a few days of pleasantness now. On Sunday went to see the movie "Inside Man". It's a bank robbery movie, but really well done with lots to figure out. I never like the idea of going to action/drama movies, but I usually end up enjoying myself.

I worked last night, but working nights isn't so bad anymore. They've changed the hours from being open until 9pm every night except Sunday, to being open until 9pm on Thursdays and Fridays only and 7pm every other night. I never liked being out that late. I'm usually a little more nervous when I'm out at night by myself, and waiting for the bus downtown at 9:30 wasn't always great. Besides, now if I have to close I still have a good chance of hanging out with Scott before he goes to bed.

I'm off for a few days now, though, and I plan to keep working on the baby blankets for Scott's cousin. She just had twins a couple weeks ago; a boy and a girl, and I need to finish the second blanket. I'm so glad I'm able to make straight blankets now. I have a chest full of crooked ones that my kids will be stuck with!

My mouth seems to be on the mend finally, although I still can't open it very wide. Eating is still a little bit dificult, but I'm almost there. I was supposed to work on Saturday, but on Friday I wasn't feeling great so I called and gave them a heads-up. I was still in some pain and I couldn't effectively brush my teeth so I was feeling pretty self-conscious.
On Saturday Scott's friend flew here from Edmonton for the second of our hockey games. I went to the airport with Scott to pick him up and was really excited about eating Harvey's onion rings. The airport is the only place I know in Vancouver to eat Harvey's so it's become a tradition for me. The best treat in the world is Harvey's onion rings dipped in honey. It sounds crazy, but you should try it. I didn't intend to get a burger, but I was really hungry so I ordered a veggie burger since they're so good there. It was too hard to eat though. I tried cutting it into small pieces, but it just wasn't working for me. I had to give it to Scott to eat.
The hockey game was a lot of fun. I was much happier with the end result since the Oilers won this time. It was a pretty important game and it's no fun losing to the Canucks in their territory..the fans aren't nice.

So Stressful!

I've never been a Vancouver Canucks fan. Since I became a hardcore hockey fan they've beaten the Oilers by playing with discipline and frustrating the Oilers so they play terribly. What's worse then losing to the Canucks? Being there live when it happens when it shouldn't have happened.
The first period was pitiful for the Oil. They were completely dominated and looked clumsy. They deserved to go out of the first period down. They came back into the second period with fire, though. They were playing the way they should, the way they played in the first 5 meetings between the two clubs this season (and won!). They were frustrating the Canucks and drawing penalties, it was great!
They had a 3-2 lead halfway through the third. They just had to hold on...they had to play defensively and maybe get an insurance goal. But no, Naslund had to score. I can't stand that guy...
So we went to overtime. The Oilers were on fire! They absolutely should have had it, but Alex Auld made some big saves and we had to go to a shoot out. Right away my heart was in my throat. I don't have a lot of confidence in Roloson as a netminder yet. Ryan Smyth took his shot and the ref declared no goal, but Smyth wasn't going to sit down. He wanted it to be reviewed because he was sure it was in. After ten minutes of nail-biting intensity, Canucks fans booing and throwing garbage on the ice (classless...), it was ruled a goal. All for nothing, though, since Roloson let in all three shots and the Canucks won. To make matters worse, we were stuck sitting behind one of those Canucks fans that makes you wish you had a beer to "accidentally" spill on him.
I feel so crappy this morning when I think about it. I just read the post-game articles and it all comes back to me. I'm nervous about the game we're going to on Saturday night. I don't want it to happen again. I want the Oilers to win by a ridiculous amount. Do I want to see Markkanen in goal that night instead of Roloson? I don't know...but Rollie needs to do something about letting in those week shots.

Here we go again...

So I had my last two wisdom teeth out yesterday and it was a little easier to get them out this time around. But, once again I've had to resort to communicating with a series of grunts and hand gestures. I'm incredibly swollen too...I look like a lop-sided chipmunk.

Scott and I are going to hockey games tomorrow night and Saturday night so today I had to go out to buy our tickets for tomorrow's game from a guy at work. I felt like a dork since I look so dumb, but no one laughed at me (in front of me).

I can't until I can eat again!

My friend from high school just sent me a link to her dad's blog. He writes poetry and it's really quite nice and different from what I've seen in a while.

http://kinmanadrift.blogspot.com/

A Lovely Weekend

I'm just finishing off a really nice weekend and I look forward to the next one. The weather was beautiful...sunny, and warmer than it's been. Scott and I had an all day date yesterday. We went to the aquarium, rented a movie (Junebug), watched a hockey game on TV and ordered pizza. It was really great. I had to go to work this afternoon, but the walk there was nice since it was so sunny. We're supposed to still have sun tomorrow and then it'll be rainy for the rest of the week.

Tomorrow I'm going to go return the rain boots I bought impulsively because I don't really like them. I just bought them because I wanted rubber boots, but I don't want to spend $30 on boots I'm not crazy about. I really think I'll just go to Canadian Tire for the ones they have on sale for $7.99. They'll do the trick. I plan to buy a raincoat tomorrow too because they are 50% off. It's a little late in the season to be buying one, but I'll likely use it this week.

I have to listen to the morning show on the radio every day this week to try and win tickets to a hockey game next week. I feel like a dork, but they'd be free!

I had a really nice weekend. On Saturday Scott and I went out with a co-worker of mine and her boyfriend and we had some all you can eat Thai food. It was great. We ended up sitting in the restaurant for a long time chatting. It's so nice to connect with people that way. Later that night we went to a bowling alley with Scott's friend, but ended up not actually playing because there were no lanes open. We had some food instead. We didn't plan to eat out so much that day, but it was still fun.

I had to work yesteday, but it was a good day. It wasn't very busy so I got to chat with my co-worker instead for most of the time. One of the girls I work with just got back from visiting her family in India and she brought me back some bangle bracelets. They were really pretty and I was touched that she thought of me. Unfortunately they didn't fit me, but I'll alway appreciate the gesture anyway.

Post Deadline Hockey Talk

The trade deadline was yesterday and Edmonton acquired some star players. As I suspected, though, Marty Reasoner left. I think I was the only one who expected it, as even Reasoner said he didn't. The poor guy had to fight off tears when the media talked to him. I've been a fan of his for years and I'll be cheering for him in Boston and hoping they can climb their way into a play-off spot. He's a hard-working player who never seems to have a lazy game where he comes across like he doesn't want to be there or doesn't care. He wasn't a big goal scorer (unless Scott and I were at the games - he scored 4 of his 9 goals with us at the games this season), but he had a few more assists and he's been described as a play-maker. He wasn't a fighter, he only has 20 penalty minutes this season so far.
Edmonton has lost a great player, but they've got what it takes to go deep in the play-offs (Although, you wouldn't have guessed after last night's awful game). I have to say, though, I think they could have done it with Reasoner's help (he wins a lot of face-off's, after all).
I don't know a lot about our new goalie Dwayne Roloson, or the new forward, Sergei Samsanov; I only know what I've read on their stats page. They look good on paper. I'll be looking forward to seeing how they connect with the other guys. I know they'll like being in Edmonton, everyone claims that they do. I've heard many players say that Edmonton is the best city to play in. It'll be fun to go the game(s) here in Vancouver in a couple weeks and see the new team up close.

So much to do!

I have the day off today and I have a whole list of things to do. Luckily, if I don't get them all done today I still have a few days to finish. I slept longer than I should have, though. I didn't mean to. When my alarm went off I hit the snooze button a couple times and then I turned it off thinking I'd only sleep for another half hour, but I slept another hour and a half instead. I was pretty tired, I guess.
Now I'm later getting started on my list. Work called me this morning to cover someone's shift, but I have too much to do and I have an appointment at the bank later. So I'll venture out into the gross rain and take care of business there.
These are some of the things I need to do:
Laundry
Clean bathroom
Clean out fridge
Do dishes
Vacuum
Take out garbage/recycling

I also want to clean out a closet and the cupboards in the bathroom, but at least that stuff is hidden away if someone pops in. What am I doing online?! I have to get to work!

Hockey Talk

Ah, hockey trade deadlines. Some of my readers may not find this time of year too interesting, but I'm curious to see what happens. Being here in Bertuzzi-ville I've been hearing a lot of talk about trading him away. I have a feeling people will whine if they keep him, and whine if they trade him. I think they should trade him away for someone who will sabotage the games the Canucks play with the Oilers.

As for the Oilers, I'm really excited to see what they do about the goalie situation. I like the idea of Cujo coming back, particularly since I was a mis-guided football fan when he was in Edmonton. Belfour can stay in Toronto or retire, in my opinion. Isn't Ryan Smyth his natural enemy anyway? I don't really know what I tink about Roloson.

I'm wondering what Lowe is doiing with Rem Murray back. I think he might have obtained him so that he can trade away another forward to get a goalie. I hope reasoner sticks around. I'm still considering getting his jersey.

Being An Emotional Woman

Oh, the wonders of being a woman. I've been weepy today and I make myself laugh because of it (kind of a weird mix of emotions). I cried watching A Baby Story because the Dad was so nervous and shaky when his wife was in labour. Then, of course, I cried when the baby was born, but that makes a little more sense. I also cried when I was watching the news because they showed the parents of a young man who was killed in a hit and run. I didn't laugh at myself for that one because it's really sad, but I don't generally cry when I watch the news. I usually just feel sad when I hear stories like that.

The thing that made me cry, and then make fun of myself was the Mastercard commercial with the guy driving the Zamboni. When I see him driving the zamboni at an NHL rink, and the crowd is cheering for him, and he's waving at them with that proud look on his face, I well up. I love that guy. I've seen the commercial twice today and it happened both times.

Tyke

Activities Tyke Enjoys:

1. Catching water droplets in the bathtub
2. Chasing Mishka
3. Playing with his "shaky, shaky mouse" and "losing" it repeatedly under the garbage can
4. Watching Scott
5. Opening cupboards
6. Saying, "brown?"
7. Playing race car
8. Jumping on Scott at 4am
9. Playing airplane
10. Being kicked
11. Taking his food out of the dish and chasing it around the kitchen
12. Taking his food out of the food dish and putting it in the water dish
13. Covering food and poop with air, Zeke, the table...etc. so that predators don't find it
14. Hanging out with Scott in the bathroom
15. Escaping into the hallway
16. Sleeping in his baskets

I Survived

Yesterday I had half my wisdom teeth out and I'm still alive. I was supposed to get all four out, but the dentist used up the maximum amount of local anestesia that can be used in one sitting. The bottom left tooth wanted to come out less than I wanted it to come out, and it caused some problems for the dentist and some discomfort for me during the surgery. I was given laughing gas to ease my anxiety, but I certainly wasn't laughing. In fact, I felt no effect and I was still quite tense. After he put in my freezing I felt my heart rate go way up and I was shaking. At the end of the appointment I finally let go of my arm and my hands were sore from gripping.
I wasn't in much pain for most of the ordeal. Every once in a while he would reach a point in his "digging" where the freezing hadn't quite done it's job and I would tell him it hurt. It was mostly gross. Throughout the cracking, grinding and dripping down my throat, (and the horrible bitter taste when he would drill my tooth to break it) I was trying not to picture what was going on. I tried desperately to watch the bronze medal hockey game going on on the TV behind the hygenist's head and I took some deep breath's of nitrous oxcide in hopes that I wouldn't pay as much attention to the terrible sensations.
Scott came to pick me up, but I was fine. I could walk and I took the bus home instead of a cab. Anyone who knows me knows that I hate taking drugs of any sort so it wouldn't be a surprise that I decided to try things out without pain killers. When I got home I sat with some gauze in mouth waiting for the bleeding to stop. I thought it was time to gargle some salt water to stay on top of infections. I did this, spit out some bloody water and sat down. Searing pain suddenly shot through my jaw as the salt made it's way down through the wound. Sunddenly the whole left side of my face was throbbing. I asked Scott to pause the movie we were watching (Cinderella Man - good movie) and go get my prescription filled at the pharmacy across the street. When he brought it back I read the enclosed papers and thought about how much I didn't want to take anything. My hands were shaking and I felt nauseated with the pain so I gave in and took a Tylenol 3. Within half an hour I started to feel a little better and I could tolerate the pain the the Tylenol 3 couldn't quite mask. When I went to bed at 8:00 I took a couple regular strength Ibuprofen and I slept considerably well. I awoke easily, but I wasn't in too much pain. Upon waking up this morning I still had some pain and I feel more swollen, but I've decided not to take any drugs. I was going to take my anti-biotics, but since I'm allergic to Penicillen they gave me something else. It says it should be taken only with serious infections because in rare cases people develop intestinal problems that can be fatal. I decided to wait it out and maybe just gargle with salt water more often.
So I survived. I've always thought I had a high threshold of pain, but I do let people know that I'm feeling bad...I don't consider it whining :). On a scale of 1- 10 I'd consider the short-lived pain an 8...I'd put strep throat at a 9 or 10. I've felt worse.
I get to go through it again in a month for the other side, though. I think I'll do better then knowing that it doesn't last too long.

25!

I turned 25 today, but it turned out pretty good and I didn't feel like an adult all of a sudden (When does that actually happen?). Scott woke me up this morning to give me a nice card and a membership for me and him to the Vancouver Aquarium. I love going there so I'm really happy about it. He took me out for dinner and then I got free gelato at the little place down the street that gives it out on birthdays.

It was really nice to hear from all my family friends today too. It's so nice when people want to celebrate the day that you came into the world. I got to talk to people I don't regularly talk to like my brother's wife, Monique in New Brunswick and Scott's brother, Paul. It was a nice day.

Weekends are too short!

Scott and I just got back today from a great weekend on the Sunshine Coast. It was so relaxing and I wish we could have stayed longer. The weather was gorgeous. It was sunny and the temperature ranged from about 2 degrees to 7 degrees depending on whether you were in the shade or not. We had a cute little log cabin nestled in some trees with a fireplace. It took us a while to get the fire going, but eventually it took off. There was a hot tub in the back yard that we enjoyed a couple of times too. We had to walk up a little path and it was sheltered in some trees with a patio built around it. The cabin was at the foot of a big mountain and was just a few steps from the ocean. I look forward to going back again.