I have a few things I should be doing right now while Brianna is napping, but I've been wanting to blog for so long. I tidied up a bit and made some vegetarian chili for supper (I'm not a vegetarian, but I love the chili). I find that I judge myself as a wife and mother and how much I can get done in a day and I feel a little bad when Scott comes home from work and I don't have supper ready and the apartment is messy. I don't know why I do this to myself since I don't expect this from other women and I certainly didn't grow up in a household where my mother kept things in their place and had supper on the table at the end of the day. In fact, it was my dad who was at home with me most of the time and while he kept things basically tidy, he wasn't the male version of June Cleaver.

For some reason, though, I have set my expectations high for myself and then when I feel over-whelmed it makes me feel guilty for not being able to juggle everything - especially since I only have one child. I also forget to do things for myself quite often (like blogging). I've had a book out of the library for 6 weeks that I'm still only about a third of the way through and I have another one on hold that I need to pick up and read. I've read the current one before, but I'm trying to refresh my memory on the story since it's part of a series and the latest story is due out next year sometime (it's Dragonfly in Amber by Diana Gabaldon, part of the Outlander series. I highly recommend the series to you). It's seven hundred and something pages long and I'm on page two-hundred and something. I've already had to renew it once and it's due back today so i'll either have to renew it again or give it up and try again later. Scott's constantly telling me that I should relax while Brianna is sleeping, but usually when I try to relax, I end up thinking about everything that I should be doing.

I'm going to have to work on this problem. I truly believe that women should take time for themselves and do what they enjoy so that they can be the best mothers/wives, but it's easier said than done for me.