Brianna now wakes up an average of twice a night now and this morning she slept in until 9:30! She was up at 8:00, and I thought she may have stayed up then, but after nursing her she fell back asleep. I took advantage of that and went back to sleep myself. She's been going to bed a little later lately with the holidays and I liked her earlier bedtime better, but I think I like this extra sleep in the mornings too!

Now that I'm not so sleep-deprived I feel so much better. My patience is better and I feel like I can get a lot more done during the day. I find myself doing my housework faster while Brianna is content to play in her exersaucer or playpen so then I have more time to relax when I get the chances. Also, now that I'm better rested, the thought of taking care of other children seems a lot less daunting.

Scott and I had always talked about how I would stay home with our kids and watch other children too so that I'd also have an income. After I had Brianna and found out how hard one baby was I wasn't so confident about my childcare abilities. I went to school for ECE with our plan in mind, but I became really scared about it. I'm starting to feel better though.

I'm going to have to start having a better routine with Bree so that she'll be used to it when we start having other kids here. I've always been pretty flexible with her; I've had a very loose routine with her. I'll continue to play thing by ear sometimes, but I need a bit more structure so she knows what to expect.

The only thing I'm still concerned about is nap time. I still put Brianna to sleep and we have our rituals for that that work for us. I'm not sure how that will work when I'm responsible for other people's kids too. I still want to be an attentive mother and not change things for Bree too much.

Here in Alberta there are government-run day homes for childcare and I'm looking into that since I don't know anyone who needs me. I emailed them and probably won't hear anything until after the new year. The families pay the day-home agency and then they pay me. I figure it might be the way to go; then I don't need to worry about the money part. I told them that I only want a couple kids that are 2-4 years and I'd like to start off part-time to ease Brianna into it. I hope it works out.