I keep having a recurring dream that I have my baby and I forget to feed her for a long time, and then when I finally try to, I have a really hard time getting her on the breast. To anyone who's talked to me about my pregnancy it shouldn't be a surprise because I'm more nervous about breastfeeding than I am about labour. I read in "What to Expect When You're Expecting" that in many hospitals the nurses will take the baby out of the mom's room and feed them a bottle without the mother knowing. This totally freaked me out and I was scared that they would ruin my breastfeeding attempts. I've finally talked to enough people who have given birth at the Royal Alex Hospital and even a nurse who works in the ward (she's the mom to a couple kids at the daycare) that I feel confident that they won't do this. But still, in my dreams something doesn't work with the nursing. Last night in my dream I gave birth to her at the point I am now and she was a healthy 7 pounds, but I couldn't remember how many ounces or how long she was. She also didn't look like a newborn. She looked to be about 5 months old with light brown hair and pretty blue eyes. Also, in all my dreams that I give birth the actual labour part is a breeze.
When people ask me if I'm going to get an epidural I find myself saying "I hope I can do it without". By saying this I still sound "realistic" to them and I avoid the comments about how they think women who want to go naturally are dumb or want to be martyrs. I have no problem with epidurals for other women. My sister is one who needs to have one. She doesn't tolerate pain very well and it helps her bond with her children better if they haven't caused her that much pain. I also know that sometimes if a woman is too stressed out by the pain it can cause distress in the baby. Back pain and extremely long labours are cases when I really can't blame a woman for wanting to get rid of the pain, even if just to have a rest. For me personally, though, I don't want one. I want to be able to walk around, I want to be able to go to the bathroom myself and I don't want to possibly prolong the process. The biggest thing for me, though, is that I'm scared of that very small risk that it could harm me and that it does affect the baby's alertness. So the real answer the question is, "no, I don't plan on having an epidural". I'm lucky to have Scott who is extremely supportive of my decision and a doula who has years of experience coaching women through drug-free labour. I don't want the pain, and I know I'll have moments that I'll think an epidural will be the best option, but I also feel confident in my own body and state of mind.
7 comments:
I thought the breastfeeding was a lot more natural than the birth, but it did hurt a lot at first (for me)
The reason I didn't want an epidural is because I'm pretty anti-drug for my body. But after the whole birth experience thing I'm ok with epidurals- it was a nice relief. And morphine- wow -that was a lot of fun. So I'm better with drugs now than I was!
But after the birth they kept trying to give me all sorts of drugs, which I didn't take a lot of them.
I'm pretty anti-drug in general too. Hopefully the baby will be nice and small and the labour will be quick...in a prefect world.
so glad for you that you know yourself so well.. and i wish you the best as you go through labour; i really hope it goes for you as you wish.
i must admit i that the labour and the breastfeeding were my two biggest concerns with my first... i knew i could take care of a newborn; i had lots of experience with that as my parents took newborn foster children when i was young. but with the labour, i also knew myself well enough to know that i would have no problem going for the drugs if i thought i needed them, and my husband knew me this well too. and for the record, i had the whole gamut. the best for me were the nitrous oxide and the epidural - i found the demoral (which i tried first) wasn't as effective for me. i didn't have morphine until after delivery (for the pain that came after the epidural wore off - it was a hard delivery partly, i think, because i was induced) and i found it really just took the pain away and let me get some much-needed sleep.
breastfeeding did hurt quite a bit at the first (with my second, too - it takes some time for your nipples to adjust - be sure to get some lanolin) but once i knew colby had a good latch i felt much better and really, i had no real problems with breastfeeding after we both got the hang of it.
hmmm, hope that's not too much information. again, i wish you a great delivery and great success in breastfeeding.
yeah, i was induced too. i think you need more drugs (for recovery) if you are induced. hopefully, you'll just go into labour naturally!
After the first day of my pre-natal class I already feel more confident. I really hope I don't need to be induced either and that the baby is in a good position. Those things would make it much harder.
I dreamt about you last night! I was visiting Saskatchewan for work and to visit my brother (my brother actually worked in Alberta, so my brain may be a little confused) I was at the maternity ward and you were there and had the baby and looked great, but you didn't see me because you were very busy on the ward teaching the other ladies!
That's a pretty amusing dream!
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